Aquarius: Warrant out for Mr. Nelson’s arrest due to finally commencing a cage match among students.
Pisces: @LEXXXI has requested to follow you. Wonderful! @Samantha (follow link in bio)
Aries: Super Soaker – Water Guns Are OUT Water SWORDS Are IN.
Taurus: The bitter brevity of life reveals itself like the flower that blooms in the first fake spring of Kansas—moments before it is shattered by the inevitable icy pangs of death.
Gemini: Something is lurking, rotting in the middle school boy’s bathroom.
Cancer: Seabury Secret Swamp hiding slimy, moist, EELS. Turn In Your Homework.
Leo: You will awake to Matt Gaetz whispering in your ear the ancient secrets of humanity (British Accent). Don’t resist.
Virgo: I’ve received a vision: oh, such utopia! Bow down to Master Wort and you will earn the Golden Urn of Virtue.
Libra: Under your pillow may lie the aid to every ailment: if you shall find the Single Eraser Shaving, your ancestors will be blessed with fruitfulness.
Scorpio: Your English students will disappoint you this week.
Sagittarius: Matt Patterson has had enough, recommends using chatGPT for your finals.
Capricorn: Hybrid fuel injection methods: Direct or Multiport—Electric Car Bomb.
