Aries: Aaaaaaah! Rand Paul is chasing me! His hands are the size of BOILERPLATES! His heelies are TOO FAST for me to outrun!
Taurus: If you throw out bacon grease with the cat litter, your FBI agent will put you on t...
Aries: First is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the chronic multifocal osteomyelitis.
Taurus: Imagine this: Father Rob plays “Teach Me How to Dougie” after chapel and hits The Dougie as you w...